Emily Wilding

I don’t want to belong anymore

I don’t want to belong anymore. In fact, more than that, I don’t want to want to belong anymore. It’s exhausting. I talk often of community, collaboration, family, connection and love. Yet, so often when I find and enter a community, no matter how lovely it seems, I find it built on division; on them and us. I cannot take it anymore. I am sick of people who hurt other people. I am sick of… Read More »I don’t want to belong anymore

Changing The name PDA

I had been meaning to write a full article regarding my thoughts on the name for my neurotype “Pathological Demand Avoidance” for a while and then another PDAer, and a friend of mine now, wrote one and so I chose not to. Sally Cat’s article is excellent, raising many different voices, including my own and crediting me appropriately. You can read it here. Why change it? There are a few issues here. Some people object… Read More »Changing The name PDA

Pathological avoidance is distinct from autistic avoidance

So many professionals, “experts” other autistics and even people in the PDA community do not understand this distinction and it is important. There is a term “autistic demand avoidance” and many people believe PDA is just that. It is Not. So you can see how people think it is the same when PDA is described often as “someone who avoids the demands of everyday life”. Equally, when any autistic person is in a constantly high… Read More »Pathological avoidance is distinct from autistic avoidance

The ADHD tax is high

It costs a lot of money being neurodivergent, especially in the ADHD type. That might sound ridiculous but it is so true. It can be financially debilitating and the worst part is, it looks so avoidable to others that there is a shit ton of shame attached to it. Why spend so much on lunches out, and takeaway? Why shopping for just a few days at a time, when it clearly costs more? Why didn’t… Read More »The ADHD tax is high

Dear media consumers… STOP

Dear consumers and families I know it is tempting. I know it detracts from our mundane and sometimes exhausting lives. Watching and often judging the people who have seemingly more fortune than we do in either talent, or luck it seems. We covet the attention, the recognition and sometimes the riches and we take entertainment from observing things we will never have. ​ ​ But on a darker note we also take a slightly sick drop… Read More »Dear media consumers… STOP

The language of neurodiversity – an analysis

Autism, Spectrum disorders, conditions, disability, Aspergers, dyslexia, dyspraxia, dyscalculia, difficulty, deficiency, neurodiversity, neurodivergence, Neurodivergent, neurotype,  neurology,  ADHD, ASD, ASC, OCD, SPD, SLD, PDA, pathological. Not that long ago I started interacting with a new community. It started with ADHD and moved on to looking more widely at “conditions and disorders” that are based in neurology. In the “neurodivergent” community, there were so many letters and so many words and to be honest, two years later… Read More »The language of neurodiversity – an analysis

The demand cup

I have talked about emotional cups for a number of years now with parents. Some people talk about not being able to pour form an empty cup meaning that you need love and energy to give. I actually believe we all have enough love to give, but agree energy isn’t always there. I talk about an emotional cup in relation to emotional regulation. Difficult emotions fill our emotional container and if it becomes to full,… Read More »The demand cup

The many moods of PDA

In some official descriptions of PDA, a “Lability of mood” is described. Here is my interpretation of the many moods of PDA and yes, much like Jack Jack from the incredibles, we can switch between them pretty fast.

UA MSC/A Neuropsychology and sociology structure

Overview My programme of study will include four core modules, each covering eight areas of study, culminating in a dissertation: Module 1: An integrated study of human development in contextModule 2: A neuropsychological investigation of human needs and motivationModule 3: An integrated investigation of key human neuro-psychological variationsModule 4: Analysing oppression as a factor in human development​Dissertation: An independent research project bringing together the subjects above. Title to be confirmed. * Study for this will include… Read More »UA MSC/A Neuropsychology and sociology structure

I feel suicidal

Sometimes I feel genuinely suicidal. At these times I really wish I wasn’t here anymore. I feel like it would be better for everyone. I want desperately to not have to manage my life anymore. I don’t have any energy left and I don’t know how the next day, week or year can be struggled through. It doesn’t feel worth it and it doesn’t feel like there is any chance that it will get easier,… Read More »I feel suicidal